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 Dark mystery at the lighthouse [Event]

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Titan of the Sea [LEGENDARY]

Join date : 2012-11-10
Posts : 509

PostSubject: Dark mystery at the lighthouse [Event]   Fri Nov 16, 2012 11:23 am

Lore of the lighthouse

I write this story to be entered in the Lore of the lighthouse event. i hope i did it correctly, i hope the brackets in title are good too, couldn't find others on this keyboard (english isn’t my first language so sorry for any incorrect spelling or grammar) ENJOY MY TALE

Closer and closer we came to the shore our hearts racing from fear and excitement. We would soon set foot ashore to check out the lighthouse we had seen so many times before. My story begins 3 hours earlier when we were still at full sea anxious that we were getting closer to home. We were looking forward to see the rays of light coming from the lighthouse welcoming us back home after a long journey across the ocean. 3 months ago we left the port of Sara Domingo after delivering our supplies there. It was the beginning of a calm and boring seavoyage. But where are my manners i forgot to introduce myself. Hay, im Jana the only female sailor on board of the “Pegasus”. What i lack in physical strength im compensate with agility and a smart mind. At the moment im counting the hours the go ashore again. Im playing some dicegames with my friends, Poitier deckhand, Louis chef’s assistant, Martin gunner second class and Thomas (considered the boats fool since he laughs without reason even when he should be serious). We are sitting near the rail on the left with a lantern in our middle. The deck beneath us white gray from the full moon shining upon it. At the rear of the ship is the captain’s hut (Jack), his righthand Lefty, and the officers Kenny, Sores, Mathieu, Phillip and Dekon. At the front of the ship are the quarters for the cook ing staff, the gunners and the best deckhands. Below our feet are quarters for Mozes the bookkeeper, Jordan the carpenter, Belvedire the mage, Doce the physician and the rest of the deckhands. We just began our next round when Eric in the crow’s nest shouts that he can see the light of the lighthouse. We all pick up our things and go to the front of the ship trying to see what Eric saw. Moments pass and then see the bright rays of light shooting through the night sky. Our voyage is now almost at an end, tomorrow early in the morning ill be reunited with my love Darius. I can’t wait to fly into his arms my hands through his long blond hair. I hope his boss, the chief of the lighthouse will give him the day off tomorrow so we can spend the day together.

A few more meters and we can set foot on shore. Me, Kenny, Dekon, Martin and a few more gunners have voluntered to go check out the lighthouse. I hope my love is still alright. The waves roll gently on the shore as we jump into the water and make our way to land. From here the lighthouse has a mysterious look. The land is black and white with shades of gray, from here we only see the white edges of the lighthouse. Now we make our way to the top of this hill where the lighthouse stands. Silently as mice we move forward with Kenny and Dekon in front and the gunners at the rear, me and Martin for the sides. As we move the grass bends away from us, leaves and branches too. Only the waves can be heard as the wind lays silent. 10 meters away are we and we can see the white door that guards the entrance to the lighthouse. As we come closer we see that the door is slightly opened. In the grass lies something that reflects the light of the moon. Upon looking at it we see that it’s the bell or what’s left of it. It’s a twisted heap of metal where it used to be the signal to announce a visitor. Now it will no longer welcome anyone into the lighthouse. Kenny, Dekon and I enter the lighthouse and stumble upon something we had never seen before.

As far as the eyes could see, we saw a mess of paper, instruments, ink, nails, glass, and pieces of wood. The clock that hung on the wall was ripped in pieces. Tables and chairs lying in pieces shattered across the floor. In this mess there was no living being to be seen. It seemed as if a fight took place here or a tornado, nothing was were it should have been, everything was broken. We moved closer to the staircase that led to the first floor and saw that the iron was dented and bend away. The iron grips that were firmly attached to the wall were no longer there. They were amongst the broken things on the ground or on the stair steps. We split up into 2 groups. Me, Dekon, Martin and 2 gunners went to the first floor the rest went off to examine the cellar and check if there was any clues of what had happened amongst the debris on the floor. On the first floor we still saw no one, alive or dead. Here aswell everything was broken. We kept on searching the other floors but without succes. On the highest floor we signaled in morse code to our brethren on the ship, there were no survivors to be seen in or outside the lighthouse. They signaled back that we should investigate further for any clues as small as they might be. The ones on the ship would land on shore in the morning and would make a camp there. 6 others from the ship would join us shortly to strenghten our ranks in case an enemy where to attack us or whatever attacked the lighthouse. 2 hours later Poitier, Belvedire and 4 others joined our group.

We reported to them we hadn’t found any decent clues and what we did found was really strange. On different spots in the lighthouse we found black hair and scares in the floor or wall which looked like claws but bigger then any living beast we had ever seen before. Some walls were cracked as if something very strong had hit it with its fists or whatever it might have been. When we came outside we heard something that chilled us to the bone. We heard the cry of a wolf far far away but that was impossible. There were no wolves in this region, the last wolf was seen 400 years ago. We decided to venture into the direction the cry sounded. Dekon, Martin and 6 others stayed behind to await the rest of the crew. Me, Poitier, Belvedire and the rest would go after the sound in the hope of finding what had happened to the crew of the lighthouse. We entered the dense forest and started our journey to find our answers.

For hours we marched through the forest without finding anything. Suddenly we heard the cry of the wolf again. A bit further to the northeast and west we saw something that looked like rags and it was exactly that. The rags were brown and black, the colors of the lighthouse crew. We finally had found something. We split up again, one group would go to the northeast, the other to the northwest. If a group found a lighthouse crew member or got into trouble they had to shoot a flare high in the sky so that the closest group could come to them. So we set off in search of the missing crew. After an hour, a fog rolled in and became thicker with each passing minute. Far ahead from us we saw something that could have been a structure so we went there. When we were close enough we saw it was a ruin, a ruin of a very old castle. We wondered how this could be, there were no old castle ruins in our lands but still there was one in front of us. Inside the ruins we saw a dark entrance going underneath the castle, in front of it was another brown/black rag. We climbed down step by step until we reached the entrance of a poorly lit tunnel. At the far end of the tunnel we could see some light. We went further with caution until we reached our destination. We came into a large hall with black stones walls, pillars 20 meters high, candles and torches near or on the wall. There were also tapistries that showed beautiful landscapes, next to them were banners i never had seen before. In the wall were several black doors with different handles to open them, one of them seemed to have been made of gold. Where on earth were we, what was this strange place.

At the end of the hall we saw people standing with their backs towards us. They were talking to each other but i couldn’t understand what they were saying. We moved closer and closer not sure what we should do. When we were 15 meters away from them, they slowly turned towards us and suddenly i saw him. I saw the love of my life with the same smile on his face as he always had. He was paler then i remembered him, he saw me and he said: “Jana, finally you are here, i knew you would come look for me”. I was so happy that i ran without a thought toward him, i wanted to be in his arms so badly. I grabbed and hugged him and told him i missed him so much. He said i’ve missed you too and now we are together forever. The next moment i felt a pain in my neck as if the flesh was pierced by 2 thick needles. I felt my blood leaving my body, his warm breath in my neck. Hours later which might have been days i woke up in a white bed with red drapes around it, my love was sitting at the end of the bed. Without turning he said we could be together forever, he asked for my forgiveness for what he had done. He felt he had no other choice he only wanted this life when i was on his side. I forgave him, i felt better then ever how strange is that. I hugged and kissed him and so he told me what had happened to the crew of the lighthouse.

The night before ancient beings were awoken from their slumber. They had slept for nearly 410 years. Upon leaving the ruins they looked for the their former enemy. They thought they were responsible for the destruction of their castle. Upon meeting them they found out the truth, our ancestors were responsible for the disappearance of the 2 factions. They now decided to take revenge for their fallen brothers and sisters so long ago. The lighthouse was attacked and everyone inside was taken away to one of two homebases were he and his comrades were turned. We are the vampires, our allies are the werewolves. We will walk the earth once again and we’ll do this for all eternity. We are no longer divided but united, together we can do what our ancestors could not. This world will become ours one day even if it takes an eternity to get there. But most important im with my Darius for now and forever. We’ll face our future together.

The end

Written by Jana the immortal
(I hope the story isn't too long)

Last edited by beltane-flames on Fri Nov 16, 2012 1:33 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Fixed tags.)
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Ocean Dweller [Rare]

Join date : 2012-09-18
Posts : 92

PostSubject: Re: Dark mystery at the lighthouse [Event]   Fri Nov 16, 2012 1:59 pm

Jana198709 wrote:
I write this story to be entered in the Lore of the lighthouse event. i hope i did it correctly, i hope the brackets in title are good too, couldn't find others on this keyboard (english isn’t my first language so sorry for any incorrect spelling or grammar) ENJOY MY TALE
Hello, Jana! I have fixed your tag for you so that you have the proper [brackets]. It's all right that you don't have them on your keyboard. All that's important is that you are reading and following directions. Wink

I think you've done quite nicely for English not being your first language. Your spelling is mostly correct, and you have a nice vocabulary. Your story reads very well and isn't awkward at all; in fact, there are few grammar mistakes aside from missing commas and some other punctuation marks. As long as your readers can understand what you mean (and I think many can), they can get out of your story exactly what you put into it! If you focus on your punctuation, you will really do well in writing.

I don't think your story is too long, but it's a little hard to read with the paragraphs being so long. If you break up the text a bit more, it will be easier. Another suggestion: don't feel rushed to finish the story. I like your story line, but it seems to move very quickly. More talking between the characters will help your readers feel more connected to them. For example, perhaps you could show us Thomas being the "boat's fool" and laughing without reason rather than just telling us? I think you could probably write some funny scenes that way. Smile

I think you're doing really well. Your writing flows very nicely, and I get the feeling you can really see everything you're writing about in your head. Keep up the good work! Very Happy
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Titan of the Sea [LEGENDARY]

Join date : 2012-11-10
Posts : 509

PostSubject: Re: Dark mystery at the lighthouse [Event]   Sat Nov 17, 2012 6:04 am

Ty very much, its my first story ever written besides things for school offcourse.
When i write something its usually a poem. I'll try to write a better story in next event.

Ceeyaa next time
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Cold Fury [Rare]

Join date : 2012-10-09
Posts : 2188

PostSubject: Re: Dark mystery at the lighthouse [Event]   Tue Nov 20, 2012 8:31 pm

Yea I agree for English not being your first langauge this was written very well and it was a good story I liked how much detail it had in it.
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